created to love Him...

I've been sitting on my front porch tonight all of 5 minutes. I'm reading a book by Andrew Murray called, "Abiding in Christ." It's excellent and making my head hurt. I've just sat down with my iced tea, Bible, journal, G2 pens (as I've been taught by John and Josh are the best pens!) and I'm ready for a relaxing time of reading and learning. However, like I said, I've been sitting here for about 5-10 minutes and already I've been interrupted 2 times by 2 different people walking down the street. Both of them were lost. Both of them needed directions to find a street that is just one block over from my house. Two different lives. Two different stories. These people were so close to their destination and both said they had been walking around for over an hour trying to find their street, all the while its been within their reach the whole time. As I talked to both of them separately, I don't know why (other than Holy Spirit prodding) but I...

Today in my quiet time I have been asking God about the state of my heart. It's been a "search me Oh God" kind of day. These days feel scary and good. I hate the feeling when my weaknesses are revealed, but this is the moment when the Father feels the most gentle with me. He loves me today and yet He loves me too much to leave me the way I am. I am caught by 1 Corinthians 10:14, which says: " Therefore, my beloved, flee from idolatry ." Flee...run...sever...these words are drastic. There is no room for lingering around idolatry, anything that has a greater throne than God in your life. I have big dreams in my heart. A few of them take up the majority of my thought life and imagination. I anticipate the fulfillment of these desires. I dream about them, think about them. Sometimes I can get so caught up in dreaming, that I waste the time I have in reality right now. It is often that my dreams consume more of my thoughts and dreams than my meditation on Jesus. It...

"Ding Dong! The witch is dead!" This is basically what I woke up to this morning in light of the death of Osama Bin Laden. The world is dancing, rejoicing and bragging over the absence of one less terrorist in this world. I don't blame the celebration...but it leaves me with questions. Ephesians 6:12 says, "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places." Bin Laden was a man created by God for the purpose of loving Him. But rather, his life was spent as a demonized leader bringing much evil to this world and training others to do the same. I say demonized because how else can one person wreak that much hell on this planet if not by evil influence? I do not think it is far fetched at all to say that within his spirit ruled cosmic powers over this present darkness. So, if we as followers of Jesus wre...

For the past several years I have been very focused (God would say obsessed!) on the dreams living in my heart...things that I am waiting on Him to bring about in my life. Often, these dreams have consumed my every waking moment making it difficult to accomplish anything else. This season has been such a faith journey for me. He still hasn't answered, but I'm realizing that there is more to His method of madness than what my human-surface understanding can see. I am realizing that He has so much more to teach me and give to me than what my little heart-dreams are obsessed about. I believe He will give me my heart-dreams, but I'm getting a clue that it will not be until I am transformed to recognize that His plans are bigger than mine and it's time to get on board with His agenda for my life, rather than remaining limited to my own imagination. He's way more extravagant and creative than I have capability for! Do you ever feel like your life is bigger...

Who has believed our message and to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed? He grew up before Him like a tender shoot, and like a root out of dry ground. He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to Him, and nothing in His appearance that we should desire Him. He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering. Like one from whom men hide their faces He was despised, and we esteemed Him not. Surely He took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered Him stricken by God, smitten by Him, and afflicted.  But He was PIERCED for our transgressions, He was CRUSHED for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon Him, and by His WOUNDS we are healed.  We all like sheep have gone astray, each of us has turned his own way; and the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all. He was oppressed and afflicted, yet He did not open His mouth; He was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before her shearers is...

The Book of Hebrews...and I have lots of questions. My usual response when I have questions about Scripture is to run to commentaries or people I view as smarter than me in the Kingdom and suck all the wisdom out of them as I possibly can hold. This past week, however, I find myself being challenged in a new discipline with how I handle the Word and the ability of the Holy Spirit to teach me Himself. I am finding that even in the area of reading my Bible, I am impatient. If I don't understand something I want to know that answer RIGHT NOW! I don't want to wait. What a difficult skill it is to sit quietly and wait on the Holy Spirit to teach me before running to other sources. It involves trust that I have the ability to hear His voice. Running to commentaries is the easy way out. Trusting the One who leads me into all truth to speak takes more restraint and patience. I can hardly talk about what God did this past Saturday night at the end of the Furious Love event. I have nev...

Yesterday morning I led worship at Redeemer. It's one of my favorite things to do while existing on this planet...definitely on my top 5 list. It was a great morning. Our congregation is such a family. It is feeling more and more that our weekly gatherings our cozy times in God's living room. Today I've been reflecting back on what happened yesterday as I often do on Mondays. I was looking at our time of worship, seeing the faces and different outward expressions of worship that were displayed. Yesterday morning was one of those days I felt completely scattered in thought and focus. It's mornings like that I am aware and thankful that His presence comes out of His love for His people...not based on my perfection or performance. As a worship leader/musician, there is this inward struggle that takes place of keeping my eyes on Him and what is on His heart vs. looking for instant gratification from the outward expression of worship from people to make me feel good in m...

I tend to take Jesus admonition to come to Him like a little child seriously! I love that I follow a God who loves child-likeness. I find that He loves to play more than we serious hard-working humans dare to imagine. God and I like to play games together. He is often the initiator, or instigator! At Redeemer, we are currently studying as a church body the letter of 1 Corinthians. I am really excited about this. It is challenging my heart and my understanding of the real Jesus. For me, the letters of Paul have always been a fight to fully understand...I think it's because of his crazy long run-on sentences. This week, we're looking at 1 Corinthians 1:26-31 and while studying this afternoon, God was in the mood to play a game. The game was to look for what these verses declare about His character. Read the verses below and then you'll see the treasures that I found. Feel free to add others that you may find. 26 Brothers and sisters, think of what you were when you were...

Sioux Falls...so cold! :) I can't sleep. The blizzard winds are blowing and shaking the walls of my house. I consider myself to be pretty big for my britches, but I'll publicly admit I'm feeling slightly anxious in this storm. Isn't that dumb?! So...I've decided to empty my full head of some thoughts in order to keep myself occupied. Much has happened over the past month...a trip to New York and Sioux Falls, the Randy Clark conference, and my quiet times alone with God have been more filled with His voice than my own lately (this is my favorite!). My mind has much to process and is filled with questions for God to answer...more questions than usual, which may or may not be surprising to those of you who deal with me on a regular basis! My heart feels overwhelmed with an awareness of God's goodness and big-ness. This past weekend in Sioux Falls, in particular, left me feeling like I was set up by Him! John, Linda and I went to serve/teach/lead worship with o...

This is a true story. This true story happened on Friday night, January 7th 2011 at Redeemer Fellowship Church in Monroe, Michigan with over 400 witnesses. Hal Benner has faithfully served the Lord for at least 32 years (that's how many years I've been alive...yep! He's my dad!). For around 20 years he has had no cartilage in both of his knees. He's had much pain on a daily basis. I very rarely heard him complain about it growing up. He would walk as best as he could to keep up with his 3 girls. On January 7th, he attended the Global Awakening conference with Randy Clark at our church. Randy, during the last song of the worship set, said that he believed many people were going to be healed while the congregation sang. We sang...God healed. Many people were healed, as Randy said. I was scanning the people in awe of what God was doing when I looked and saw that my dad was waving both his arms, indicating that he, too, had been a recipient of "on earth as it is ...