The Sovereignty of God and my 4 year old Da Vinci

I want to know Christ and Christ crucified. Christ and Christ crucified is the perfect display of submission to the sovereignty of God. It's more than that. But right now the sovereignty of God, His supreme and ultimate power displayed over, in & through my life is where my head is fixed. If He has supreme and ultimate power, then I have very little on my own, if any, as I submit my life to Him. He is the Master Artist, Creator and Upholder of this earth and all its inhabitants. 

My girls LOVE art - drawing, painting, creating, cutting, nail polish - any form of adding color and imagination to their world. Often my 4 year old will hand me a picture she's designed with pride and fulfillment in her eyes. She's so excited when she shows off her finished product. Sometimes I've made the mistake to say something like, "Oh, Ellie! That is such a beautiful butterfly! WOW!"  To which she'll respond with eyes rolling, "Mom, that's me and Daddy riding our bikes on the beach." Uh-oh. I just misinterpreted her creation. I assumed I knew better than the master artist. Never, from all of the works of 4 year old art that she's made has the artwork itself offered a suggestion of what it is. It has never given an interpretation of its own self. That wouldn't make any sense, since it didn't create itself. It was created by another being with a specific purpose, order and design. Mona Lisa will never tell us the true reason behind her smirk. Da Vinci alone is the interpreter of that mystery because that smirk came to be through his creative process. 

Our world is very interested in identity. Who or what one identifies with is what they must be by our culture's message. And much of that identity has become limitedly defined by our sexuality and preference. It seems so small to me. Why is this all our lives have become - our sexual preference? Is that all there is to be known for? But I also don't understand what it feels like, as a white heterosexual to have to fight daily for my right to choose how I want to live. We all have choices to live however we want. God gave humanity that gift when He placed the 2 trees in the garden before Adam and Eve. Choose. Decide. Pick your way or My way. From the beginning - we could choose - but the choice always came down to my limited choice (2 trees) or God's abundant choice (the rest of the orchard). Selfishness vs Submission. Sin vs Righteousness. I'm on the throne or He's on the throne. I can say I identify with anything I want...heterosexual, homosexual, gender, a teacher, a mother, a goose, etc. That's my choice. I can be whatever I want to be. But the fight to be whatever I want to be is a fight taking place completely on the "my way" side of the choice without any acknowledgement of the other possibility...God's way. The fight to be whatever I want to be is the fight to protect my entitlement. It's the fight to protect my own sovereignty over my life. That's all fine until one says to Jesus, "into Your hands I commit my spirit." That's all fine to fight that entitled fight to declare my identity until I say to the Master Artist, "I follow You." Jesus followers cannot identify themselves as anything or with anything other than Him. A follower has no sovereignty over the One they are following, just as the Mona Lisa cannot say to Da Vinci why she's smirking. 

Our culture, and now sadly some of the church (and even more sadly - people I've walked with and love in my Jesus journey), have bought into a perversion of truth that each of us can choose our own identity and destiny AND follow Jesus at the same time. We can have the best of both worlds. Me and Him. But to know Christ and Christ crucified is to know a life of dying to me and living for Him. My perception of who I am is now no longer sovereign. I've submitted my life to the Master Artist, which means I've submitted myself to the design and identity the Master Artist intended me to be. To succumb to the temptation to be anything outside of His design and purpose for my life is sin, is choosing my way instead of His way. 

Jesus chose the way of His Father over His own way. He chose the plans and purposes for Him laid out by His Father instead of what He was tempted to do (See Matthew 4.) Jesus was tempted His entire life to do His own thing, just as we are. He was tempted daily, not just in the events of Matthew 4. He was tempted by men, women, power, money, time, position and authority. At any moment He could have chosen those things. And yet, His motto was, "I only say what My Father wants me to say. I only do what My Father wants Me to do. Love looks like laying your life down. Following God looks like Jesus walking His death tree along the journey while being taunted by humanity, falsely accused and judged unfairly. Following God looks like Jesus walking His death tree taking every step, as His broken flesh cried out in agony dying slowly. Following God looks like Jesus, knowing He could heal and save everyone in a moment, yet choosing to submit His power, His solutions, His love to the ways of the His Father.   

If you don't believe in God, then by all means keep fighting your fight for your identity, power and entitlement. It's all you have and all you know. But, if you want to know what it means to follow Jesus, then you must come into an agreement with Him on sovereignty. It is no longer you who live, but Christ who lives in you. It is no longer your known or desired identity, but the Master Artist's design and definition of who you are. All is lost (2 mere trees) to gain all of Him and His Kingdom (the entire orchard). Be ready to die to all that you desire and know to gain all that He desires and knows. Be ready to sacrifice and die to self to be raised to sit with Christ in heavenly places as God's son or daughter. Do not be fooled into thinking that you can follow Jesus and lead yourself at the same time. There can be only one sovereign on the throne of your life.  Jesus, today, again I place you on the throne of mine.