the Father's heart...

The past few weeks at Redeemer we have been continuing our Jesus study by focusing on the crucifixion passages. Bob Sorge, author and former worship leader at IHOP, says that in order to mover further into the love of God you must become an obsessed scholar of the cross. If you want to understand what true love is, look at Jesus on the cross. It displays the love of the Son. It displays the love of the Father. It displays the love of the Holy Spirit.

Lately I've been wondering a lot about the Father's view of the cross. I find it's true of my life that I remember events often in comparison to the emotions that tied into those events. I have many memories of differing situations involving emotions of joy, delight, surprise, excitement. I also have memories of events tied to grief, sorrow, anger and disappointment. As memories arise I find that the emotions linked to those memories are often felt all over again. How is it with the Father every time He thinks about the cross?

Jesus is so clear that His mission here on earth was to only do what He saw the Father doing and to only say what He heard the Father speak. His final words here on earth were, "Father, into Your hands I commit My spirit." Even in death, Jesus was submitted to the will of His Father. What kind of delight and pleasure does the Father take in the Son? How intense is His love for Jesus? What emotions well up within His heart over the Messiah? God the Father will never forget the cross. Even eternity will not be able to wipe that event away from His memory. How often does the Father ponder the cross? What was He thinking during those 3 days as He watched His Son being mocked, tortured and murdered? How intense were His emotions?

I know that the event of the cross was orchestrated so that we faulty humans could gain the wondrous relationship with God. My life is set on the course to understand this grace and love more. But even in that, I can be so self-centered to believe it's only about me...that Jesus only had me on His mind; that the Father only was paying attention to...ME! Yet, lately I'm wondering if, regardless of the Father's omniscient knowledge of what the cross would accomplish, He was more grieved and devastated in the moment of Jesus' death than I could ever understand? To watch His precious Son so willingly obey His every heart's whim, even unto death...what does that do to a Father's heart?

As I've been asking these questions, the extent of the Father's sacrifice and love for me is beginning to sink in. May it continue to sink in deeper and deeper still.

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